We asked young detainees inside Bay Area juvenile halls to write about their relationships with their mothers in honor of Mother's Day and many of their responses reflected the issues that are breaking families apart today: violence, mental health issues, immigration problems, and drug and alcohol abuse. These authors write for The Beat Within, a weekly journal of art and writing from inside juvenile halls and prisons.
R.I.P. Mom
My mom passed away in October, but we just had the funeral on April 2nd. She was missing for a while and they just found her…bones. It was really hard for me cause there wasn't anything I could do. I was in here, locked up. When I found out the news, I ain't going to lie, I came back to the unit a ticking time bomb, just waiting for somebody to get outta line. But nobody said anything, so I just keep it cool. This Mother's Day is awful. I'm really not in the spirit. It's like I lost a part of me. One thing I really regret is not being there sometimes cause I was too busy kicking it. My mom was a respectable, loving, caring mother who loved all her kids the same. I miss how she used to beat up on other people's moms for me. Like this one time when I was little, I left my backpack sitting outside while I went to the store. When I came back, it wasn't there. Then the next day, I saw the people next door with it. So I approached the kid who had it, who was about my age. When I told him it was mine, he kept denying it. Then his mom came out talking about: 'My son found this, it ain't yours." Then I called my mom and she said "This is my son's backpack! Y'all got my son F'd up. Y'all better give him his s--- back, before there be some serious problems." She was a little tipsy too, so I knew if they didn't tell her what she wanted to hear, it was going to be cookies. So, the kid's mom was like: "Okay, okay, here you go. I don't want any problems." But the point is she always took care of me, and I love my mom for that. I just wish she was here.
- Lil Marcos
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